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Saturday, November 13, 2010

I'm Back....

Okay....so I totally lied about my last hiatus being over....but WOW has life given me a curve ball, so now it's officially over!  Tons to talk about....tons to say...

Since I was last on, my girls have gone back to school, I've gone back to school (yes, still chugging along on my Bachelor's Degree), I'm working and have experienced some heartbreak!

I'm learning to be me again.  It's been a while since I've been comfortable in my own skin and thanks to a great support system, I'm starting the see the vibrant, confident, happy-go-lucky person I used to be.  I'm learning that with such extreme highs comes extreme lows....that I can cry and pick myself up and not wait for someone to rescue me....that I can love completely without losing myself.

I'm going through an extremely tough time and I have to say, it's a humbling experience.  I don't have the luxury of laying down to die like I use to, I use to let life consume me and I'd allow myself to fully grieve, I can't now.  I'm a mommy with responsibilities, I don't have time...so I grieve little by little, between dropping off my girls at school and making my way to work, before I pick them up, while I shower, but mostly when I cry myself to sleep at the end of the day.  I concentrate on making sure I'm busy, busy, busy....so busy that I can't think about those things that drag me down under.

I'm learning to take baby steps in my life.  I've always just jumped into life full force with both feet, but now I'm taking things slow, over-thinking things mostly, but making sure I don't make the same mistakes.  So bare with me everyone, I will try to keep my posts positive, but I'm sure those days will creep up on me when I just have to vent.  Stay tuned to my drama....there's plenty more to come!

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